Friday 1 October 2010

" Hello Springfield, are you ready to Roooccckkk"

I am going to be off of the radar for a few weeks on my American tour. I say tour what I actually mean is that I am going to throw myself off of the Niagara Falls in the despair of having hit the ancient age of 50 years old.

To me this is a matter of depression; however as my son often points out to me, I may generally be the oldest thing on the bill normally by a good 20 to 30 years but I can normally rock all my opponents off of the stage any day of the week. So I should rejoice that I am still in the game and I am still rattling a few cages.

My plan had been to find myself a platform somewhere in the States in order to sing just one song. This would then give me the right to proclaim myself an ‘International’ singer.

I’ve sung in far flung European places such as Romania, but as yet not out of the European Union.

I did in fact sing a stupid song I had written 10 minutes previous all about ‘messing about in boats’ whilst on a cruise down the Nile in Egypt, but to be truthful, that didn’t really count.

However once again, my plans to visit the Colonial shores guitar in hand have once again been thwarted…this time purely by the hands of lady time.

I had been offered the opportunity to perform in Philadelphia but common sense and the need to get some sleep at some point on the trip dictated that the Philly connection be set adrift in favour of a dash across the border into the Canadian Territories.

However; if you hear tell of a Brit who has been arrested endeavouring to sing “I fought the Law” on the steps of the Whitehouse whilst his wife accompanied him on the rice paper and comb then there may be a very good chance that it was me.

Oh, incidentally, if any of my readers are those of the ‘scan social sites in order to find whose away in order to burgle their property’ types, then forget it…….the Loader junior clan are taking up residence in our abode and we are praying Lord that we have a house to come home to.

So be warned…all trespassers will not only be tortured by being made to listen to loud and offensive music, but made to clean and tidy.

3 comments:

Unknown said...

Have a great time while I distract your kids with old photos of you and burgle your house.

Happy Birthday.

Bass Bin said...

You have stuff worth burgling your house for..? Lucky Rock God.

I'm with Quick Sketch in the first wave of the Shock and Awe distraction team. While QS shows them old photos of you, I'll distract their unbelieving attention with a pair of 28inch waist jeans that you used to be able to wear. Good times.

Have a great USA tour...

Rock God said...

You scoff....but I really did wear 28" jeans right up to when i got married and discovered the joys of cooking (and Shiraz).

My 28" trousers really would have been high waisters had the Rock Gods senior allowed me.